Bellona isn't quite sure of her new life these days and I can't blame her. She was always alpha even though she is 8 months younger. Without him to keep an eye on, she seems a little lost without him. My lone wolf has certainly been seeking more affection and the extra cuddles are helping us all heal.
My dogs are/were/will always be spoiled. So in a fit of guilt last night I ordered her the water fountain I had been eyeing, a new cover for the bed that was once Max's, and spent a lot of time brushing her teeth last night. Somehow these were all little things on my to do / to purchase list that kept getting bumped by other more important priorities. But now, those trivial things seem much much larger to me. Frankly, I'm petrified my time with her is limited. Her dad passed away of unknown causes at 9. I can't take any day for granted.
Bellona enjoyed destroying a stuffie last night as well. We never allowed them in the house because the risk of ingestion and surgery was simply too great with Max the goat around. Ironically, I grabbed a frog totally forgetting the rubber frog Max once ate and then birthed out whole if you know what I mean. When my friends pointed this out, I had to laugh. It was probably the first time I laughed and had a happy memory. I guess that's progress however fleeting those moments are right now.
Bellona also played with her Nina Ottoson toy. Too bad she's too smart to get as much mental stimulation out of it as I'd like, but she had fun. I hope these little moments help her feel normal again. If you have lost a dog, how did you other dog grieve? What did you do to help ease their unspoken pain?
When I lost my beloved Murphy (a rescue from the pound) unexpectedly to an epilepsy seizure that his vet could not stop I was just lost.
ReplyDeleteHe was my love and everyone adored him.
About a week later I received an e-mail from EMAR asking for help in placing a little pittie puppy.
I sat and just looked at my computer for the longest time before I allowed myself to open the attached pictures.
But when I did I was in love instantly.
And we adopted Greighson.
Greighson was found dumped in a ditch with his sister in Mississippi.
Not a day goes by that I do not miss my Murphy.
But Greighson helps me through that because I would not have him if it was not for my loss of Murphy.
And Greighson needed a good home.
I have come to terms with the fact that this is life, an inevitable tragedy, and unavoidable.
And I thank God for allowing me to be blessed with the time I had with Murphy and to know that love.
I also take peace and solace in knowing that through this event my heart was opened to a new love; my Greighson Andrew.
Not a day goes by that I do not miss Murphy, but I honor my Murphy by loving my Greighson and know that that is what he would want me to do.
God bless you and your family.
Im glad you and bellona got to spend some time together and good for you for ordering the things you have wanted, ive been dying to get the water fountain thing myself :)
ReplyDeleteHang in there!
I am pretty sure my dogs would destroy that toy out of frustration. I can understand why you are spending extra time with her
ReplyDeleteKari
http://dogisgodinreverse.com/
When I lost Roxie last year, Maddie grieved in a way I never would have expected. She would not eat or play and was always walking around the house crying-she was a mess. It may have been too soon for us, but we went straight to the humane society and fell in love with a dog there. So I took Maddie over for a meet and great and they were in love!! We brought Mollie home just 2 short weeks after losing Roxie and Maddie and Mollie have been the best of friends ever since-they are attached at the hip!! I still talk to Roxie everyday and I am pretty sure she would be happy that we saved a life and gave Maddie a new best friend.
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